“How was your day?” Rebecca asked her twelve-year-old when he came home from school. “Ok,” he responds. “Did you learn anything new today?” she asks. “Nope,” her son plainly says while staring out the window. “Well, what did you do today?” she asks. “Nothing,” her son responds in a tone of voice that was clearly saying, “I’ll be thirteen next month, mom, please stop trying to talk to me, gosh!”Rebecca picked up on this tone of voice and stopped the conversation there. Do you find it difficult to communicate with your own children? Does it seem hard to connect with... (Read More ...)
Articles Written By Jody J. Pawel
Debbie’s thirteen-year-old, Darren, is a poor behavior example for her younger children. She is constantly telling Darren to keep his hands to himself and let the younger children do things on their own. She tells him, “You’re not their parent,” because he tells the younger children what to do and tries to punish them. The younger children get frustrated with the bossiness of the older child. They don’t like how he is short with them and they whine at him to leave them alone or tell him “you can’t make me, you’re not my mother!” In Debbie’s situation, there are... (Read More ...)
Effective Problem Solving Strategies: How Do You Teach Children To Responsibly Solve Their Own Problems?
“I don’t know what’s up with my friends lately. It seems they never have time to hang out and do anything I think will be fun,” David complains to his mom, Chloe. “Well there is so much you can do on your own, David. What do you need your friends for? Why don’t you go read one of those books from the library or practice your guitar?” Chloe suggests “Agh, Mom, you just don’t understand. Don’t you know what it’s like to want to hang out with your friends anymore?” David asks “Well, if they don’t want to do the things you like, then what kind of friends are they? ... (Read More ...)
Brad’s fiancé, Rebecca is 40 and he is 46. Brad is divorced without kids and Rebecca has a fourteen-year-old son from a prior marriage. When they moved into Brad’s home, Rebecca’s son became difficult. He has rejected all prior suitors, not because he wants his parents to get back together, but to be the man of the house and to control mom. He even got upset when Rebecca asked him to give her away at the wedding, since he thought he was losing her. He doesn’t want her to see Brad and that is not going to happen. What can Brad and Rebecca do to assure him that he is important, he isn’t... (Read More ...)
Kimberly wants her children to be honest, but sometimes she unintentionally models lying or responds to lies in ways that make matters worse. For example, When a sales person calls, Kimberly has her children tell them she is not home. When she’s at a restaurant, she lies about her children’s ages to let them eat off the kids menu. When she is given extra change, she keeps it. Kimberly is surprised when she finds out her older son has been lying to her about going to a friend’s house after school and instead has been riding his bike to the park to play soccer. It was a fluke she even found... (Read More ...)
How Do You Respond When Your Child Presents You With a Report on Best Family Dogs and Begs for a Pet?
Jessica’s daughter, Lucy has been begging to get a pet. Lucy has spent time researching “best family dogs” and “best dogs for children” on the internet. She has even compiled a list of “why you should adopt a pet” and has been sharing it with her friends. Jessica and her husband both grew up with a dog and know the love and companionship a pet can give a child. They are tempted to get a pet, but are also aware of how much time a dog needs to be trained, groomed and taken care of on a daily basis. Jessica would love to let Lucy pick out the dog of her dreams, but is just not sure... (Read More ...)
Susan is shocked as she picks up her seven-year-old daughter at school and sees her holding hands with a boy. “Who was that?” Susan asks her daughter as she gets into the car. “Oh, that’s my boyfriend, Robert” her daughter replies. “Your boyfriend!” Susan responds. “Yeah mom, we’ve been dating for three days now and I think we’re in love. We might even get married someday”. Susan is shocked by this news. How could her seven-year-old daughter (who thought boys had cooties last week) be in love with a boy and holding hands? “I hope this doesn’t get too serious,” Susan... (Read More ...)
While doing the laundry, Kelly discovers a folded up note in the pocket of her thirteen year old daughter’s jeans. She unfolds it and sees that it’s a note that a boy named Bobby was supposed to receive, but never did. Kelly folds it back up and sets it on her daughter’s dresser. Later that night, Kelly asks her daughter who Bobby was. Her daughter, blushing bright red now, explains that he’s “just a friend”. Kelly doesn’t bring it up the rest of the night, but wonders if there is anything serious between Bobby and her daughter. Is your teen or preteen ready to move from puppy love to... (Read More ...)
“I want more juice!” demands Eric, Ashley’s four-year-old son, from the dinner table. Ashley politely replies, “Please don’t talk to me like that. Say ‘please.’” Then Eric starts to whine, “But Mom, I’m thirsty! I want more juice!” Ashley tries to be patient and says, “Honey, I know, just say ‘please.’” Now Eric’s whining becomes an ear-piercing scream. He throws his fork, shoves the table and stomp his feet. Frightened by Eric’s outburst, Ashley quickly gets him a glass of juice and says “Okay, okay. Calm down. Next time please ask nicely.” This incident... (Read More ...)
Karen is so annoyed. Her 2-year old daughter, Tina, is constantly telling her “no!” or becomes defiant and refuses to cooperate with even small requests she typically went along with just last month. Karen’s friend tells her, “Oh, this is normal for 2-year olds. She’s just going through that terrible twos defiance stage.” Even though her friend tells her it is normal, Karen wishes there was a way to nip this stage in her daughter’s life. She wants to enjoy her daughter’s cuteness, but is anxious wondering when the next toddler tantrum will arise. If you are like most... (Read More ...)